Posts Tagged ‘Self-esteem’

What Do Video Games Say About Us

Monday, August 8th, 2011

3 billion hours, both children and adults are consumed by the amusement of video games.  Obviously, having fun is why we play, but why are the games fun?

Recent research has shown that the appeal lies in how video games allow players to adopt desired personality traits, which in turn bolsters their self-esteem.  Studies have investigated the idea that many people enjoy playing video games because it gives them the chance to “try on” characteristics they would like to have as their ideal self.Much research on video games has concentrated on the possible harmful effects, ignoring the simple question of why people actually want to play them.

A key finding in the current study is that having the ability to virtually change identity and acting through the identity (be it hero, sports star, villain, or a different gender) makes people feel better about themselves and less negative. Researchers found that the enjoyment element of the video games seemed to be greater when there was the least overlap between someone’s actual self and their ideal self.

The suggestion that people are using video games as a positive, self-esteem builder instead of a way to escape from themselves is itself significant.

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Facebook Depression

Sunday, June 12th, 2011

 

“Another potential risk of social media has been dubbed ‘Facebook depression.’ When preteens and teens spend too much time on social media sites, they may begin to show classic signs of depression, such as changing sleep and eating habits, experiencing mood swings, hanging out with different friends or becoming socially isolated” says Dr. Gween of Pediatrics Now

 It is no surprise to anyone that children and teens are spending more time than ever before on the internet using social media such as Facebook, Twitter, and Chatroulette.  But just what are these outlets doing to the mental heath of our children?  In the past year, there has been several cases in which teenagers have taken their own lives due to bullying and responses by members of these social networking websites. 

What is “Facebook Depression”?

Facebook allows users to showcase their lives, from achievements to travel photos to parties. The depression creeps in when teenagers start comparing themselves to their friends.  Why can’t my family go on a vacation like his? Why is my boyfriend in pictures with other girls? How come she got a new car for her Sweet Sixteen? Experts have agreed that social media sites exacerbate envy and jealousy due to the pressures of the “my life is an open book” appeal of social networking.

What can parents do?

Parents should be actively involved in their teen’s social life, both offline and online. Encourage your teen to get off the Internet once in awhile and do activities outside the house to avoid the temptation of returning to the computer.  Get them to join clubs or encourage them to get into a sport or learn to play a musical instrument. It is important that your teen understand that there should be a balance in his or her life. It is important that parents keep an open line of communication with their teens, just as their teens enjoy a sense of openness with their friends.

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Boost Your Self-Image for Summer

Monday, May 16th, 2011

Whenever something goes wrong in life, we berate ourselves saying, “I’m an idiot. What was I thinking?” We can forgive others for their wrongdoings but why are we so judgemental on ourselves?
When we first heard the word “No” as a child it began a long string of events that continued through childhood as we learned new skills, into adulthood when all of our actions are judged by our bosses, family and friends. Studies have shown that children involved in authority-child interactions have reported 70% more negative feelings with only 30% being a mix of positive and neutral. How do we overcome this destructive self image?

  1. Become aware of your inner voice- when a mistake is made; realize that you are only human. Separate that one events from every other positive action that you have accomplished
  2. Analyze what you are telling yourself- don’t use “I never..” or “I always..”. Absolute terms are irrational and illogical. They do not reflect reality.
  3. Write down your thoughts- it will increase your mental processes so you can understand what your own mind is doing in shaping your vision of the world and yourself

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Extinguishing Burnout

Monday, May 2nd, 2011

Burnout is a state of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress. It occurs when you feel overwhelmed and unable to meet constant demandsIt is more common than depressing but less severe, more temporary in duration, and caused by a situational stressor.

Major Symptoms:
Fatigue is one of the major symptoms of burnout. You feel emotionally exhausted and overwhelmed, drained and unmanageable.
Depersonalization occurs when you don’t want to engage with anyone and you lose empathy. Its hard to relate to other people and even yourself
Loss of confidence and competence is the third symptom of burnout. You feel like your life is slipping out of control.

Revival of your life:
Set boundaries. Don’t overextend yourself. Learn how to say “no” to requests on your time. If you find this difficult, remind yourself that saying “no” allows you to say “yes” to the things that you truly want to do.
Take a daily break from technology. Set a time each day when you completely disconnect. Put away your laptop, turn off your phone, and stop checking email.
Learn how to manage stress. When you’re on the road to burnout, you may feel helpless. But you have a lot more control over stress than you may think. Learning how to manage stress can help you regain your balance.

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Success over Stress

Tuesday, April 26th, 2011

Everyone suffers from some sort of stress. Worrying about school, finding a job, financing the bills, whatever it is there’s ways to alleviate it.
STOP thinking negatively: negative, pessimistic thinking will tighten muscles in your body, causing rapid breathing and high blood pressure. Try deep breathing, relaxing, unclench your fists and whenever a negative thought comes to mind, turn it positive.
TRICK your mind: your subconscious does not understand the difference between something real and imagined. So tell it something positive! Make a list of seven to ten things each day and pick one to repeat to yourself every morning and night. Imagine yourself accomplishing it as you recite it.
FIND the silver lining: instead of viewing an unfortunate event in your life as permanent, think of it as a temporary solution. Maintaining optimistic interpretations of events leads to the generation of T-cells which are imperative for sustaining your immune system.
LAUGH: it is well known that laughter is the best remedy. But did you know that children laugh more than 100 times a day while adults only laugh around 15?. Laughter induces the release of endorphins which in turn over ride our stress hormones creating a sense of tranquility in our lives. So watch a funny movie, read a joke book, and surround yourself with positive fun-loving people.

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Raising Your Self-Esteem

Tuesday, August 10th, 2010

We have all heard how low self-esteem is often the culprit for unhappiness, but not many people tell us how to improve it! Here are some ways that will help you get started!

Identify Strengths. Identify and appreciate your own unique abilities and talents.  You can write them down or simply take a mental note of them.  Are you a good dancer? A great listener? A good organizer?  Make sure you remind yourself of your strengths as often as possible.

Recognize Achievements. Take pride in your achievements, both big and small.  Realize that they are not due to blind luck, but hard work and dedication.  YOU did it; YOU made your own luck!

Love your body. Begin to accept your body for everything that it is, right now, at this very time.  This does not mean stopping your goals to lose weight in order to be healthy; it just means accepting your body and respecting it.  Your body is such a vital part of you, so be good to it!

Accept yourself. Accept what you can and cannot change.  You cannot change your height or your past.  If you have the ability to change things in your life, then do it.

Set Goals. Set realistic goals and make sure to reward yourself upon completion of these goals.

Learn From Mistakes. Don’t overact to errors.  Realize you have a right to make mistakes.  Next time try to look at your mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow from.

Take control. Realize that you have control over many aspects of your life.  Regaining control can help you increase your self-esteem.

Ditch Perfection. Focus on accomplishing your goals and not on perfection.  Do your best.  Realize perfection is unattainable!

Forgive. Forgive yourself and others.  Bottling up anger at yourself or others is a self-esteem killer!

These are simply a few ways that you can help increase your self-esteem.  Try focusing on one or two at a time and then building on them.  It is not an overnight process, but you can make drastic changes in your well-being by being proactive and starting right now!

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The Undervalued Self

Thursday, July 15th, 2010

How do you feel about yourself?

Research has shown that how you evaluate yourself is directly related to your ability to make positive changes in your life.  How you evaluate yourself is also linked to your health, how well you take care of yourself, how you communicate with others, how effective you are in your career, and also whether you are open to life changes.

So, how are self-esteem and change connected?

It may help to think of an example.  Think about a friend or perhaps a time when you constantly told yourself or someone else the same story ridden with blame and complaints towards other people.  Notice how in your story you are never at fault and you took no steps to change your situation.  We have all done it, but being aware of it is very important.  Have you ever wanted to change something like your career, your relationship, or living situation but somehow (despite all of the self-help books and goal setting) you cannot make the desirable changes?  It’s likely that the problem is not in knowing what to do nor is it in understanding how to do it.  The issue might be in believing you are worth making a change; that you deserve it.

How do you discover your self-worth?

Shift Your Perception

Much like standing in a different spot of the room in order to get a different perspective, you can change your perspective on life.  People tend to view their experience from the same perspective and say “that’s just the way it is”.  Try changing it up a bit and taking on a new experience, you might find things aren’t exactly what you thought they were.  Find a new perspective! Otherwise, life can be boring.

The Three Magic Phrases

“I love myself. I forgive myself. I set myself free.” Try to let go of hurtful things you did to yourself and others in the past and make amends.  Constantly being mean to yourself is toxic!

Use Your Automatic Tools

There are plenty strengths you have that you forget about.  For example, you know that when you take a deep breath in the midst of an argument it calms you down.  So, remember this and continue to use this skill.  After a while it will become automatic!

“I’ll see it when I believe it”

If you say “I’ll see it when I believe it” on a daily basis then listen up.  The truth is that until you believe it is possible, you won’t see it.  Tell your skepticism to back off, and realize that being open minded and hopeful will help you experience a world of change!

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